You've got some interesting ideas here, and I will agree that the writers could have done more to explore how "Becoming" might have affected the Scoobie's relationships.
But I don't buy your idea of Xander being Iago. For one thing, you seem to be a little dismissive of the idea that Xander has any motivations besides hatred of Angel and a desire to possess Buffy. Yes, there always has been some sub and not so sub - textual jealousy in Xander's dealings with Angel, but Angelus is a murderer who takes delight in torturing his victims. Xander has every right to be afraid of him and to worry that Buffy's romantic attachment to Angel might cloud her judgment when it comes to dealing with him.
As for persistently manipulating Buffy and never treating her as a person and never getting punished for it - I don't agree. Sure, he has fantasies like in "Surprise", but I got the feeling in later seasons that he'd started to realize how immature these fantasies were and to treat Buffy as an equal. Speaking of punishment, by the end of the show Xander's lost two girlfriends due to his actions, had his eye gouged out, and been forced to face his own relative weakness in comparison to the other characters.
(here from <lj user="resolute">, sorry about the late commenting
Date: 2008-07-26 09:02 pm (UTC)But I don't buy your idea of Xander being Iago. For one thing, you seem to be a little dismissive of the idea that Xander has any motivations besides hatred of Angel and a desire to possess Buffy. Yes, there always has been some sub and not so sub - textual jealousy in Xander's dealings with Angel, but Angelus is a murderer who takes delight in torturing his victims. Xander has every right to be afraid of him and to worry that Buffy's romantic attachment to Angel might cloud her judgment when it comes to dealing with him.
As for persistently manipulating Buffy and never treating her as a person and never getting punished for it - I don't agree. Sure, he has fantasies like in "Surprise", but I got the feeling in later seasons that he'd started to realize how immature these fantasies were and to treat Buffy as an equal. Speaking of punishment, by the end of the show Xander's lost two girlfriends due to his actions, had his eye gouged out, and been forced to face his own relative weakness in comparison to the other characters.